Relationships as a Path of Awakening
By Guest Blogger: Mackenzie Eason
Relationships are a central part of being human. They are the thread that connects us to each other. We can think of them as mundane, just a part of life, but they are actually a pivotal part of living a truly awakened life.
If not tended to well, relationships can be a source of great suffering, and can even become a place to numb yourself and “go back to sleep”. If tended to well, though, relationships can be an incredible source of personal growth and illumination. Not to mention, become a precious gift in your life of harmonious connection and shared love.
4 Keys to Making your Relationship a Part of Your Spiritual Path
The trick is, though, that while relationships have this potential to be an entry point to more love, oneness, and awakening (yes please!), they also have the potential to be a place where our deepest pain, emotional triggers, and fears come up. To add some additional challenge, none of us were born with relationship manuals. In fact, many of us grew up with the exact opposite: unhealthy modeling and dysfunctional examples of relationship from childhood. This intersection of love and pain, although at times difficult and challenging to navigate, does create the perfect gateway for us to heal and actually embody our spiritual understandings. Here are the 4 keys to making your relationship a part of your spiritual path.
1. Self Responsibility
Taking self-responsibility for your emotions, reactions, pain, suffering, and experience is essential. This is important because blaming only leads to more division and strips you of the opportunity to actively work on a blocked or stuck place inside you. Most often, when you have a strong emotional reaction, it is coming from pain in your past that was inside you well before your partner ever came on the scene. Your partner may also be perfectly and divinely designed to push your buttons and bring to these places to the surface. As frustrated and challenging as it may be, it is crucial you stay aware of the deep triggers when they arise. Meet them with as much love and compassion as you can, recognizing that your partner cannot “make” you feel anything.
2. Disarm Defenses
There will be moments (like when you’re arms are crossed, your tone gets snappy, or you leave the room mid-conversation) when you or your partner gets defensive; The walls go up. Make a commitment to take a pause from those conversations where each person is trying to prove rightness. Connecting from your defenses only leads to more “them against me”, and blocks you off from empathy and compassion – two central themes of spirituality.
3. Emotional Mindfulness
Emotions are tools that lead us back to our hearts, our hub of feeling and healing. It is paramount that we bring our mindfulness practices to our emotional states so we can better understand our internal landscape. The more you are mindful, the more you expand your self-awareness. With this increased awareness, the less you instantly react. This gives space to live and interact with life and your partner from a fully present place.
4. Honor Contraction
Expansion and contraction are a normal part of any relationship. In fact, tightness and contraction often follow the big expansive love-filled moments. There is a wisdom to the waxing-waning process, which continually titrates you toward a greater capacity to give and receive love. The more we welcome and honor the contracted times as sacred, the better we can meet it, move through it, and allow love to do its transformative alchemy.
No matter the duration or exact context of your particular relationship, if you apply these keys, you are bound to have a more fulfilling relationship, in addition to having a more embodied spiritual journey. This combination of tools and practices gives you the opportunity to live every day more awakened, living from the soul, and present to love.
About the Author: Mackenzie Eason
Mackenzie is a relationship coach and hostess of the Embodied Empowered Engaged Podcast. She specializes in helping women understand their emotions, find their truth, and cultivate real self-love so they can experience connected, drama-free, and nourishing relationships. She offers online courses and 1-1 coaching to women worldwide.
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