I asked my yoga teacher, Sharon, for some tips on doing headstands. Sharon is in her 60’s but looks much younger. In a very kind and gentle voice she asked,

“I’m curious why you want to do headstands?”

I hadn’t really given it much thought. I guess I thought they were cool to do. Secretly I was kind of proud of my ability to still do a headstand at age 56. I didn’t want to admit any of that to Sharon, so I said,

“I like the benefits of doing inversions.”

Sharon responded,

“As we age we want to be careful to protect our spine, particularly our cervical spine. You can get all the benefits of an inversion like a headstand by doing safer postures that don’t put pressure on the cervical why are you doing thatspine. It’s important to look at the deeper motives that are driving us to do what we do.”

I’d never thought of it that way – that all the benefits of headstands were more safely accomplished by other poses. Nevertheless I wasn’t quite ready yet to give up on headstands. What was that about?

I realize there are many levels of motivation that drive me to do what I do. Sometimes I’m looking for growth, self-improvement, or new challenges. Other times I’m doing what I do to get approval, to feel valued, or to belong. Mostly I don’t think about why I’m doing what I do, relying instead on habit, routine and customs. But every now and then – when I realize what I’m doing is making me miserable – or it’s putting me at risk of a physical or emotional injury – I do have to look deeper and ask myself,

“Why are you doing that?”

“Is there another way to get the benefits you desire without putting yourself at risk, without making yourself miserable?”

“What do you need to let go of to make that happen?”

Yoga matLooking into my motivation around doing yoga postures is an easy arena to observe my ego at play. I haven’t done a headstand since that day and my ego hasn’t really suffered as a result. Yoga provides a great opportunity to practice observing my motivations because the stakes and the emotions aren’t that high. In addition I have the support of great teachers who remind me to let go of competition and comparisons by “keeping my eyes on my own mat.” They invite me to close my eyes and “go inward” seeing what my body needs today in this pose.

But there are other arenas as I walk this journey of life where motivations for doing what I do are complicated. The stakes are higher and I don’t have a wise teacher right there guiding me through it. You know what I’m talking about. We all experience these challenges – like eating food that isn’t good for us or being in a job or a relationship that makes us miserable. Whatever the arena, the questions remain the same and are worth exploring:

“Why do you keep doing this?”

“Is there another way to get the benefits you desire without putting yourself at risk, without making yourself miserable?”

“What do you need to let go of to make that happen?”

Questions to Ponder:

Are there areas in your life where competition, ego, fear and/or other’s opinions of you are causing you to act in ways that put yourself at risk of physical or emotional injury? Or even spiritual injury?

Why do you do what you do? Listen beyond your first response to see if there are deeper motivations driving your actions. Do those motivations need to be updated, discarded, or recommitted to?